Hell Ride

release year: 2007
genre: biker action/drama
viewing setting: home DVD, 5/31/09

synopsis: The leader of a biker gang gets revenge on the rival gang leader who murdered his girlfriend in 1976, while also planning to give her son his inheritance.

impressions: I'm going to try to keep this simple. One way might be this statement I made around the middle of the movie: "I think this movie might be just like an actual biker's life, in that things just happen for no reason and nothing really makes sense." In my opinion, this film was all style and no substance. People get shot in the head with no warning, because they were just talking about going against their gang's leader. The safe-deposit box containing the mysterious inheritance is opened, but we never get to see its contents. Two members of the same gang have a prolonged fist/bottle/chair fight for no apparent reason, and then act like nothing happened. A guy gets shot in the stomach with an arrow, appears to be dying, and then is just mysteriously walking around again without any explanation. There's a bar in the middle of nowhere that contains promiscuous young ladies with perfect bodies, whose only purpose in life is to willingly entertain bikers who are old enough to be their grandfathers. And so on. Yeah, I know it's intentional B-movie sleaze/cheese, but still, it seemed to meander and take way too long to get to the point.

something this movie has that no other movie has: A decapitation by garrote.

acting: Larry Bishop is Pistolero, leader of the "good" biker gang. Michael Madsen is The Gent, his right-hand man who dresses well. Eric Balfour is a young member of the gang and the recipient of the inheritance. Dennis Hopper is an old biker. David Carradine is an old evil biker who's moved into the white-collar world. Vinnie Jones is the current leader of the evil biker gang.

final word: Biker exploitation film, heavy on style but lacking substance.

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